Have you ever looked up to someone and wished you could take on their character traits? For me, I have always had a handful of people that I admire or want to "be like when I grow up."

I had a really meaningful experience in my early 20's that I want to share, a helpful exercise to tap into what you see in others, and to begin taking on those traits.

You will need a blank piece of paper or possibly a page in your journal to start.  

Begin by making a list of all of the attributes you admire in others.  This could be actual characteristics, or simple ideas.  Mine looked something like: Kind, Humble, Intelligent, Risk Taker, Humorous, Adventurous, Athletic,  Practical... The list went on and on.  

Once you have your list, really take it in, read it over, notice if there are any words that stand out to you or if you left anything out.

 Now here is the fun part, start to evaluate the list from the perspective of what attributes do you currently embody, and which ones do you honestly not currently display? Make a list, of the ones that are currently not a part of your make up, sometimes it can help to ask a friend as we can be our own worse critics.

Once you have your list, pick an attribute per month and put energy into embodying that trait for that month.

 For instance, if kindness is something you would like to be more known for, look for ways to be kind.  Open doors for others, drop off soup to your friend that has the flu.  Go out of your way to hone the skill of being kind and before you know it by the end of the month you will find yourself a kinder person.  You will find it is much like going to the gym to exercise your muscles, the more you use the muscle the stronger it gets. The same principle applies when integrating an attribute, the more frequently you flex your kindness muscle the stronger it will become.  Once you have integrated kindness, move onto the next attribute.  

The moral of the story being this; seeing what we want to aspire to be in others is important, creating a plan to evaluate the things we admire in others and a plan to integrate them is something very different.  For me, active change happens when I create a plan and a system to make the new idea a working part of my life.  When I made the connection that all of the attributes I admired in others were options for me too, if I practiced, I have been able to become what I most admire in others. 

By being the qualities I see and admire in others, I become the person I aspire to become. Or more so, get to know the person I already am more intimately.  

Do you have a role model? Someone you aspire to be like and would like help doing the exercise I listed above? Send me a note by clicking here: and let's chat about your aspirations.

Click here to chat with me

connect with me!

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Lindsey Rainwater, also known as Lindsey RainH2O, is a sought-after business consultant, leadership coach, writer and presenter to the fitness and wellness industry. For more information about Rainwater, follow her on Twitter @LindseyRainH2O

Who doesn't love a good story? Juicy details, suspense, sweaty palms. The other day my friend was describing her first sky diving experience, walking me through ALL the little details, I tell ya, my palms were sweating, leaning forward on my elbows, she had my full attention, and I am ready to jump myself after hearing her experience!  

While the story itself is powerful, it is also just as critical that the listener participate fully for the story to have impact! The Listener holds as much importance as the story! When a story is being told, there is always the chance of interruption, distraction or the like to derail the speaker.  All of this to be said, the power of listening is key to the success of the story.  Without a participating listener, the story can not be told. 

There is a game in the world of improv called "Yes, And" that wraps a nice bow-tie around the concept of story telling and listening. The following definition according to wikipedia articulates the concept.

Improv Rules of Yes, And according to Wikipedia:  

"Yes, and..." is a rule-of-thumb response in improvisational comedy that suggests a participant should accept what another participant has stated ("yes") and then expand on that line of thinking ("and").


"Yes"
The "Yes" portion of the rule encourages the acceptance of the contributions added by others. Participants in an improvisation are encouraged "to agree to the basic situation and set-up." Thus, "By saying yes, we accept the reality created by our partners and begin the collaborative process."

"And "
In addition to accepting the premise offer by others, a participant in an improvisation is expected to add new information into the narrative. Hence the phrase "Yes, And!"

 Yes, we accept the reality created by our partners and begin the collaborative process.

Acceptance and then collaboration, that can not happen without active listening! Make the choice to listen, without looking for an "in" to be relevant, instead wait for the speaker to complete their thought and then once they have reached a pause, contribute authentically. 

Remember when communicating the Yes, And game, Listening is a powerful, under utilized skill that can go the distance when properly utilized. Listen thoughtfully, and then, begin to collaborate. 

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Lindsey Rainwater, also known as Lindsey RainH2O, is a sought-after business consultant, leadership coach, writer and presenter to the fitness and wellness industry. For more information about Rainwater, follow her on Twitter @LindseyRainH2O or check out her website www.linseyrainh2o.com. 

Time is of the essence, and usually always is. There will always be deadlines to meet, and a work/life balance for which to strive. Even in finding that balance, are you still over-committed? Are you able to give the best you have to offer to everything you have to do? Your productivity and activity is a direct result of what you are saying yes and no to.

Seth Godin breaks down some pretty good tips on when you should say no to something:

On saying "no"

If you're not proud of it, don't serve it.
If you can't do a good job, don't take it on.
If it's going to distract you from the work that truly matters, pass.
If you don't know why they want you to do this, ask.
If you need to hide it from your mom, reconsider.
If it benefits you but not the people you care about, decline.
If you're going along with the crowd, that's not enough.
If it creates a habit that costs you in the long run, don't start.
If it doesn't move you forward, hesitate then walk away.
The short run always seems urgent, and a moment where compromise feels appropriate. But in the long run, it's the good 'no's that we remember.
On the other hand, there's an imperative to say "yes." Say yes and build something that matters.

Time is something you can never get back. Having your priorities in line with your goals, both for life and professionally, is imperative. But opportunities we’re given, meetings we’re offered, etc. can’t always fit in our schedule. And if you somehow do fit everything in, something somewhere is compromised. 

After learning when you should say “no,” learn to actually stand your ground, and confidently decline. Where you answer yes or no to is a huge indicator of where your time is going. Make it count. Whatever you say yes to, make sure you’re able to give it your best.

When saying no to things that are lower priority and that you truly don’t have time to give your best to, you will be more productive and successful in the areas of life you do say yes to. Keep your priorities straight, and guard them with “no.”

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Lindsey is a sought after business consultant and big leap coach, writer and presenter to the fitness industry and beyond. For more information follow her on twitter @lindseyrainh2o

The definition of insanity, you know the saying, “doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result.” What I find so interesting about this notion is that so often we find ourselves doing activity for the sake of doing it, focusing on what we know and playing it “safe” instead of taking risks and learning something new in favor of gaining results.  

So then, how do you know if you're doing the right activities and thus truly driving productivity?

Having walked through this question myself multiple times, I have created a resource for those that are struggling to achieve outcomes. My goal is for you to have a way to evaluate current activity and to explore how to evolve the activity to accomplish true productivity. The following ideas are from my own experience of embracing change and evolving as a means for getting things done. 

At the end of each day, how much energy do you have? 
Have you ever met someone and you were baffled by how much they got done in a day and  managed to still be pleasant and excited about what they are doing?
That person more than likely knows where they are going and is taking daily action in alignment with where they want to be. This is a person that has tapped into what they love to do and are renewing their energy all day long, investing activity in where they are going. 

At the beginning of your day, do you have clear objectives or do you “wing it.”
When you are part of a system that has a strategy and a desired outcome, there is no question about what your daily activities should be.  My experience is that once I decided where I was going and reverse engineered a plan, my daily actions also became very clear.  Getting clear on your desired outcome, generates a clear daily path resulting in activities that are productive. 

Ask yourself, Do I know where I am going and why? 
Once you have asked yourself that question, the next action is very obvious.  Decide where you want to go.  I love this question, because it is not exclusive
 to business, this is a BIG LIFE question.  What do you want? Where do you want to go? Who will be making those choices? The neat thing is, to me, is that you get to make it up! And then decide what organization you would like to be a part of, what kind of role you would like, if you are going to have children or not.  The world is your canvas, paint! 

It is very difficult to demonstrate your effectiveness if the activities you are engaged with are not in alignment with creating results.  Often times, it takes feedback from others and input because you might not see an alternative to the path you are on, because it has been all you know.  In my life, I have experienced feedback and opportunities that have allowed me to see that sometimes the actions I am taking and using up all my time on are not actually generating any results, and therefore not being productive. Start with these questions and then start asking for input, ask a neutral third party what they think, discover new ways of doing things.  Ultimately, realize that you have the capacity to create whatever you want in life and that taking action towards your end goal is up to you and readily available! Be productive by taking the action in alignment with where you want to go and don't forget to enjoy the journey along the way.

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Lindsey Rainwater is a consultant and coach to the fitness and wellness industry.  She specializes in business development and leadership. Currently she is working with the Fitmarc Team helping Health Club owners all over the south central region of the united states propel their business forward via group exercise solutions.  For more information about Lindsey, follow her @lindseyrainh2o, all content posted at www.lindseyrainh2o.com 

There is a difference between knowing what to do and actually doing it.  

Have you ever sat with a friend who’s pouring their heart out to you then asks, "What would you do?"  Only for you to share what you would do, and have them immediately start their story over as soon as you take a breath, disregarding what you just said on the topic. I like to call those people "ask-holes." Lots of asking, no action. 
 

There are large gaps between wanting change, being willing to take action, and then actually doing something about it. Usually the reason people don't do something is because it takes work and it takes you doing either doing something differently or making a tough decision you don’t want to make. Though we may want our situations to be better, not knowing what it will be like during the transition or exactly how it will be after we make a change can be scary. This usually keeps us from actually doing something about it and becoming complacent.  We all want the glamour of being on the other side of our problem, but the reality of the difficult steps to get there is too daunting.  

I am here to tell you that based on my experiences the only obstacle standing between what you are experiencing and what you want to be experiencing is ACTION: Creating a plan and then doing it.

" A dream written down with a date becomes a goal.  A goal broken down into steps becomes a plan. A plan backed by action makes your dreams come true." -Greg Reid. 

Like Mr Reid is talking about, making something more than just a dream and creating a new reality can be a daunting task, and is usually easier said than done. Consider a few basic ideas to help you make good on your plans, turning dreams into your reality.

1.  Let yourself dream. Actually daydream and picture the perfect life for YOU, then write it down.

2. Working with the end in mind, figure out which steps are necessary to get you to where you need to be. Keep these steps realistic, making them small enough to be implemented every day, helping you track your progress. 

3.  Celebrate achievements along the way. Break up your plan into milestones and celebrate your progress, encouraging you along the way when you’ll need it.

4.  Tell someone. Saying something out loud and having someone else aware of your goals and where you want your life to be can help you make tough decisions and give you the courage and motivation to get there.

I find that I can dream all I want as long as I know where to move my feet and keep my head in the game. It is in the action I find the greatest satisfaction of progress.  Remember what I talked about last week, in that your daily habits can make you who you want to be. Start small, but start somewhere.

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Lindsey Rainwater is a consultant and coach to the fitness and wellness industry.  She specializes in business development and leadership. Currently she is working with the Fitmarc Team helping Health Club owners all over the south central region of the united states propel their business forward via group exercise solutions.  For more information about Lindsey, follow her @lindseyrainh2o, all content posted at www.lindseyrainh2o.com